Our new horror flick, which art called “The Unholy,”
Predictability be thy name.
Evan Spiliotopoulos’s directorial debut come,
His throwback to the silliest mid-2000s spookfests be done,
On atonal plot as it is in supernatural-horror expression.
Give us this brief runtime, its saving grace,
And forgive Jeffrey Dean Morgan,
As we forgive an extended cast opting for playful in a screenplay working against them.
And lead us, “The Unholy” will, into clunky dialogue and silly asides,
Inevitably delivered in these familiar struggles between good and evil.
Hail Producer Raimi, full of enduring influence,
This movie’s most spirited moments are with thee.
Blessed are thinly drawn allegories about blind faith,
And blessed is “The Unholy’s” occasional willingness to lean into the fruit of its ideas.
Spiliotopoulos, whose pen mothered this movie,
Pray that you will go even weirder in your next effort,
Now and after “The Unholy” arrives in theaters at the hour of our coming weekend.
"The Unholy" is rated PG-13 for violent content, terror and some strong language. It opens in theaters Friday.
Starring: Jeffrey Dean Morgan, Cricket Brown, William Sadler, Cary Elwes
Directed by Evan Spiliotopoulos
[[Note: When "The Unholy" releases in the U.S., it will largely be at indoor movie theaters during the ongoing coronavirus pandemic. While the purpose of this review goes deeper than binary recommendation to discuss the film's merits as an artistic work in context of its time, we encourage our readers to continue exercising the latest safety guidelines from health authorities and consider them if and when you may decide to visit the cinema to watch this movie.]]
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