I'm one of those people who tries to make good experiences or pleasurable times last forever.
That's exactly why I listen to loud music in my car from the beginning of my trip to the end.
It's why I sleep too late when eight hours is enough.
It's why I sit in restaurants talking until after they've closed and the waiter has closed my tab.
It's why the once breathtakingly beautiful flowers on my desk have died.
They've been here way too long.
It was a running joke in our office for a long time.
If you see a beautiful flower in Bridget's office, it's also likely you'll see it dead.
Get rid of things. Move past the moment. Throw the shoes away. Why do I have a hard time doing it?
One of the biggest lessons I learned in the past few years, is that if something is dead, let it die.
Why continue to look at a plant and water it, if the life in it is gone?
Three day before Valentines Day, I got the most beautiful bouquet Of European cut roses I'd ever seen.
Almost five weeks later, they're still here.
It's not that I don't realize they're dead , it's me wanting to hold on.
Maybe what I'm holding onto is the pleasant memory of what the flowers meant when they came.
One , has to do with who they came from, the other, that they came way early and unexpected.
Subconsciously, when I look at the brown buds and dead leaves scattering my desk, I still remember what the arrival stirred inside me.
Sometimes on a random day, that feeling comes flooding back.
But it leads me, as most things do, to deeper questions.
Why do we tend to want to hold on to things that no longer have the same meaning?
Why do we want to keep relationships with people who've proven they're no longer who we thought they were?
Why do we keep an old dress in the closet and it hasn't fit in years?
I guess, there is something safe in trying to preserve good feelings.
It's human to want to feel good all the time. To want to associate with something that once brought
you good feelings.
But, it's also dangerous because in someway, the universe can cruelly remind you, that nothing in life lasts forever.
Not even beautiful flowers cut from the finest vineyard in France.
At least I'll always have the card that came with them.